pics of the week
i writen this on the sand when i was at the chalet at changi last tuesday.. will write abt the chalet when i'm free k...
Last nite...
pic of me when we're at my house these past few days
he was parkouring and playing soccer at void deck with me.Masturah @ 9:52 AM
omg.. today i'm going indonesia. my flight will take off at 8pm and i need to be at the airport at 6pm. i'm suppose to meet baby today. but i dun think i'm able to. mum dun let me go out cos i have lots of things to settle before i'm going for indonesia.
baby, i hope i get to see u again today before i leave. i wont be able to meet you even when i'm back. but its ok, we will have a great day next thurs, thats when i'm free. we've planned to go east coast again. baby, i had a great day with you ytd. you told me last nite that ytd was the bestest day he had. i noe its true, cos i saw ur smile. baby, i really love you so much.
baby, i noe things arent so well sometimes, i noe there r things going on that u noe i will never be happy abt. i already knew wat was it but i'm sure u'r not that mean to hurt me like that. after hearing you last nite, i knew, u will only love me, love me as much as i love you right now. baby, lets take time to build our trust on each other.
i told you last nite that if u ever hurt my feelings the way you described it, you will regret it. i will be the most mean person you'll ever met. but if you really do and we break up, i will not treat you like i noe you. i will forget you completely even those special moments we had. i will treat you as if i dun noe you, as if we dun have a history togather. if i see you on the streets, i won't even look up to u. i will treat you like a stranger and enemy like i did to someone who hurt me so much previously. i noe its mean but i will do that if things happen. but baby, dun worry, rite now i love you so much, i won't be that heartless until you hurt me so much and i noe u're not that mean to do such things.
baby, we shared so much special moments togather, but last nite was the most special one we had. although it was a simple talk and walk around the neighbourhood, it was the most special one. what captured my heart was when u looked me in my eyes, grabbing my hand tight and said, "i want to treasure what i have right now." i saw how happy you were, i really can tell. it was so special for both of us cos he told me that he never said like this to a girl and i'm glad i am the one who heard it. baby, i really love you so much, i can't bear to leave you today. u're too special to me that i'll do anything to make you happy. i once told him that 'i wish i can make you happier'. but than he look up and said 'being with you makes me happy already'. omg, i wonder how i will live my life if we were to be seperated.
baby, u mean so much to me, please dun hurt my feelings just because i said ok to anything you want to do. i noe you won't hurt my feelings cos i noe you love me. baby, i love just being in your arms, feeling the warmth of your neck. baby, you're too special to me. i love it when u call.. remember those lines? baby, i noe some girls are after you, i can't blame them cos u r really good at making people feel good. i hope our love is strong enuf so you wont leave me for them. baby, i love you too much to be able to see that.
baby, please take care of yourself when i'm gone, i'll be back before you noe it. we've been through this before, its hard but i'll be back. i'll come running into ur arms once again when i come back. baby, dun worry abt me, i'll take care of myself, my family will be there for me. baby, dun skip your meals k. its even harder this time round cos you wont be able to send me today and fetch me when i'm back cos i'm with my family.
baby, i'm going to miss you so much. i'll call you when i get there, behave urself k. dun be naughty with other girls, if you love me, i noe u won't do such things. i trust you that you'll keep your words. baby , please remember that trust is to be earned, not receiving it for free.
baby, i love you so much, i'm glad we shared those special moments mentioned and those special moments not mention here. i can't say more that i love you too much. i'll stop here, bye everyone...
Labels: my baby is my everything
Masturah @ 8:42 AM
hey everyone.. although i was very tired, i had a great day with baby izzy today. was at the hospital the whole night last nite. i overnite at the hospital to take care of granddad. it was not creepy at all at the hospital. was really tiring cos he could'nt sleep and he was in so much pain. at 4am, i could'nt take it anymore, too sleepy. even shutting my eyes for a few second i fell asleep while rubbing his back. as soon as he fell asleep which usually lasted like 5 to 10 min, we rush out to the sofa area. we were too tired to even care for anything that we fell asleep instantly at the sofa. woke up at 8am, the nurse woke us up cos visitors starts to roll in and we lay down on the sofa. nana told me that he went for dialasys, so we went home. we go off at 10...
baby was suppose to fetch me but he overslept. can't blame him cos he accompanied me on the phone till 2am... so i waited for him at yishun mrt, he came at 12 plus. the wait not so bad la cos got wireless internet access.. hahaha.. i was so tired that i fell asleep in the train if i shut my eyes for a while.
we than go back to my place. i took shower than accompanied him play ps2 at living room. he surprised me cos he brought Hostel. he wanted me to watch it badly though i did'nt want to. so we watched Hostel, he skipped all the way and only show me the gore part of it. damn it! disgusting and scary. baby was so bad that he took away the pillow i was hugging, he did'nt want me to cover my face. we were hugging each other on the sofa, i was like grabbing his shirt real tight, trying to cover my face. ass, he dun let me.. hahaha.. luckily i was comfortable in his arms.
than he played games which always got problem. i was like playing with mr pringles till i fell asleep a couple of times. baby wanted me to go to sleep but i refuse cos i want to spent time w him. than after that he make me go to my room. i went to bed, he played my lappy. i fell asleep right away. half way wake up, i found myself hugging him, he was beside me. he was making me feeling real comfy that i went back to sleep. woke up at 4 plus. than we played the games that we love to play so much, it was real nice and fun. i nearly lost my game.. hahahha.. its always nice bt this time round its much better, infact it gets better everytime we play this game. real game real fun hahaha..
than at 5 plus we went out, we went to the food court at north point. i ate beef stripped spaggeti. trust me, its really sucks, baby's speggati is much better. than went to long john silver, baby ate his dinner and we bought crazy potato... than we took the bus to admiralty. we went to his house, he got stomach ache and wanted to change his shoe. so i chat with his mummy. the neighbour was crazy, abuse the daughter.
than we went to play soccer at his void deck.. fun!! hahaha... that he play parkour. jumping everywhere... was real cool he jump here and and there.. took pic of him... later i post it k.. we went around the neighbourhood. play at the playground and the fitness corner... than we walk to causeway point.
along the way we talked. he said something real sweet to me. cos i was saying that i dun want to look at his past anymore cos it makes me feel insecure. i said, lets not look back in at the past and look forward for the future. he than look into my eyes and said, 'i dun care about my past and my future, i just want to appreciate the present with you.' something like that, he said he is real happy with me, never felt such joy and happiness until he is with me.
he admitted that he flirts and date many girls before he met me. he did stuff with them like he did to me on first date. but with me was great cos he felt instant comfort. he dun have to pretend to be cool and stuff. usually, he cant be himself, but with me, he is very comfortable and happy. that was y our date is not just one day but lasted till today. he said he loved me for who i am... and i'm glad i can be comfortable with him.
was shock hearing his revelation but i just accept it cos it was all in the past. i told him i'm worried and scared abt his past, he said not to worry, he wont go to another girl cos i am enuf for him. i am everything that he wants. i asked him how much i meant to him, he said, if i dun mean that much to him, he would'nt send me early in the morning and waited 2 hrs to fetch me at harbour front. and i noe how much i meant to him without him or anyone telling me. he said that he have never said this kind of things to anyone or any girl before. i am so touched when he said like that.
seeing him everyday, how much he grow inside me, i noe, he sincerely love only me. i noe how much he love me. he said that he wont cheat on me like how he did in the past cos i dun deserve such things. i noe he wants the best for me. and i hope he wont cheat on me. although i noe he have lots of girls friend somewhere in some parts of his life, i noe i am the only one he love and no one else. there was one day he told me that he felt that he is the luckiest guy to have found me, he felt real lucky to found me in so random contact in friendster. i love my baby so much.
niways reach causeway went to the pasar malam, bought tako ball, ate at basement. than we decided to walk at admiralty mrt so that we can spend more time with each other. was really tired though. reach mrt station, he gave me a tight hug, kissed me and said he loved me. than we seperate. i reach home at mid nite.
going to spend my last few hours with him later before i take off to indonesia. will be gone for another for days. leaving my baby again. hope the blast we had today and the days we had previously would be enuf to spare for him when i'm nt around. he took the jacket and gg to pass it to me tmr along with his elmo. i'm going to miss him so much..
k, bye, i post more later...
Masturah @ 12:50 AM